Monday, September 22, 2008
wishing girl was closer
today was a day when girl wished many times that she was already with Master and Mistress. She had an interview today at Bob Evans for a Hostess position and girl has orientation on Thursday to start the job. she wished she could have called Mistress or Master and told them the news right then, but she had to wait until she got home to the computer.When girl was out before Bob Evans she checked her cell phone. girl does not leave it on since she seldom gets any calls or message on it. There were 3 mean messages from girl's 14 year old son. Last night girl's son had a major attitude. He walked by girl's daughter age 8 and he just punched her in the arm for no reason. Granted girl's daughter can usually be very annoying but at that point the daughter had done nothing to warrant the son punching her. Girl sent her son to his room. As girl's son was stomping away he said he wished girl would die.well the text messages from her son had been sent 2 last night and 1 this morning. first text was sent at 7:57 pm Either you fix things or 1 of us will die. next was at 8:27pm I do home you die because ever since your selfish decision my life has been a living hell. you have successfully ruined my life and future. i hope your happy. then this morning at 743am i apologize for the other messages you are my mom it is your job to ruin my life and i understand that.when girl read these messages all she wanted was to be able to talk to Master or Mistress. girl was so upset she wanted to cry but just didn't. girl wanted nothing more than to be able to talk to one of them. to just be able to cry and even better for one or both of them to just hold me and make it all better.sometimes girl thinks about how similar being a slave is to being a child. girl wonders if being a better slave will help her be a better mom since she is apparently not doing so well.
Posted by slave lisbeth at 6:02 PM
this was written in my physical journal before going to sleep last night at 10:49pm.this girl did something very bad and wrong tonight. She argued with Mistress. Mistress told girl to d her punishment kneeling with the plug, dildo and clothes pins for the 10 minutes and then go take a shower to help girl relax for the night. girl started arguing that with all she had on her to-do list she really didn't have time to relax. while girl was arguing with Mistress she was working on thngs that needed to be done too.....emails to Mistress and Master, checking her college classes, working on her to-do list for tomorrow.girl was already a bit upset that Mistress added yet another thing to girl's daily to-do list. now girl has to post a daily blog entry about girl's thoughts and feelings she has throughout the day about Mistress and Master. So when Mistress told girl to stop what she was so frantically trying to get done to go relax in the shower, it got to girl even more.girl and Mistress got into it and girl ended up leaving the computer and set her online status to kneeling, shower and bed. Mistress replied while girl was kneeling. When girl checked it, Mistress had replied that she had not told girl to go to bed but to return back to her.girl was so mad at Mistress that kneeling did not even calm her like it usually does. After her kneeling girl got a shower, but it did not relax her one bit. for girl a shower is to get in, get clean and get out. always rush. always something to get done.girl got out of the shower and returned to the computer not really any calmer than she was before she left it.girl did apologize to Mistress for arguing with her. girl aso told Mistress that lately the thing that relaxes girl most is chatting with Mistress or Master --- with the exception of when girl is getting in punished or lectured.girl is not really sure how or why but the rest of the night girl and Mistress had a nice evening chatting, at least girl things so anyway. girl is also not sure how or why, but girl feels closer to Mistress tonight after what happened. seems kind of odd.
I am slave
I am owned
I am to please
girl must remember this at all times.
Posted by slave lisbeth at 7:46 AM